Saturday, January 15, 2011

Day 6

I slept 9 hours last night and dreamt I ate gluten, was attacked by a dog, and went surfing.  I do not eat gluten, I've never been attacked by a dog, and I've never been surfing.  I think it was bagels that I was eating and everyone was freaking out telling me not to eat them.  I blew them off saying that I would be fine.  The last time I ate gluten intentionally was at a Korean restaurant after yoga a few weeks ago.  I love Korean food and one of my favorite dishes is Korean pizza/pancakes.  I knew there would be gluten and I ate it anyway, putting my trust in the high doses of digestive enzymes that I take whenever I eat out.  I was fine at first but the next day I had stomach cramps and fatigue and skipped yoga to stay close to the toilet.  It wasn't bad and I'm hoping to try again soon.  With the enzymes, I can handle cross contamination and small amounts of gluten, like soy sauce or thickeners.  I don't know what this has to do with class today, oh well.  I felt really good about Eagle, Camel and Balancing Stick Poses.  It's not that I thought I did them perfectly, but that I gave them every ounce of effort I had in me.  My right Trapezius is tense and it's hard to turn my head to the right.  This has happened a few times since starting yoga and seems to go away with a little rest, Tiger Balm and Epsom Salt baths.  This week has been hard and my energy is waning.  Unfortunately, a classmate, who is at 18 days, said that the second week was even harder for her!

Locker rooms are a new thing for me.  None of the high schools I went to used them for gym class.  Thank god.  At first I was very uncomfortable, not because I had qualms taking my clothes off in front of strangers, but because people get uncomfortable with naked bodies.  I'm over that a now.  We all just spent an hour and a half mostly naked, dripping sweat, and working our bodies to their limit.  We all have to get undressed, showered, and dressed again.  Conversations in the locker room are a whole different story.  It's really hard to look people in the face when they're naked and talking to you.  And there is so much going on around me, people squeezing through, showering, toweling off, putting lotion on, doing hair...  If you glance in the wrong direction at the wrong time you get a glimpse of something you might not want to see.  Or maybe you do, but you can't look like you wanted to see.  Then there's the gay thing.  I know there are other lesbian and bi women in the locker room but what do the straight women think and feel?  That's out of my control.  The only thing I can do is take care of me.  But that doesn't stop me from having all these concerns.

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